Should Relationships be a Family Affair? Joro Olumofin writes


When you’re dating someone, should you date their whole family too? This is one of the most common questions in couples therapy and counseling because Family plays a major role in the success or failure of a relationship. There is no
fixed solution or approach towards this question or phenomenon; Should you date your boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s family too?

This is because it is relative. Families personalities and society frameworks all differ, so there is no generalized solution but only a situational solution. This being said, some people today, date their
lover’s family even extended family too.

They develop an intimate relationship with their boyfriends family members , attend all family functions, add all family members on bbm, whatsapp, Facebook, Instagram, go to their boyfriends house to do chores ( wash plates, clothes), go and help their boyfriends mom to tie “gele” and cook for her, travel to other states for a distant uncles’ birthday party, call their boyfriends cousin to dish out relationship advice, etc.

The question remains are all these acts beneficial to the growth and prosperity of a relationship? Are these acts unnecessary? Are you giving people the right to interfere in your relationship? In my Opinion, I believe you shouldn’t date your bf/gfs family too. Of course one can have a cordial relationship with them, but don’t involve them in the day to day activities of your relationship because they are going to bring their own experiences, expectations and requirements into your relationship and sometimes even tell you how how to manage your life or affairs.

Extraneous Variables in Psychology always need to be reduced or controlled to get an Objective result. Also, sometimes you need to make your own mistakes so that you learn first hand from them. As I said earlier, it’s relative. So do what WORKS for you in your own situation and environment.”…… and make sure u pay it an attractive salary, say a monthly pay of N213,000 for a start……

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