I’ve never had an orgasm with my boyfriend; how do I tell him without crushing his Ego or jeopardizing our relationship? — Joro Olumofin gives his take

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Therapists and Psychologists alike fault Sexual Performance by men or women as a major reason for breakups, infidelity, and relationship debacles. Apart from money, men r highly motivated and gratified by SEX so how do u break it to ur man dt he has
never or rarely satisfies u without hurting his feelings? I must also say dt studies av shown dt most men think they’re “Beasts” in bed i.e they believe their partner reaches her climax at every encounter cuz they’ve never been rated or their partner always fakes an orgasm.

Some guys brag to their friends: “I murdered her behind last night, I’m KingKong under dem’ sheets” meanwhile their girlfriends feel otherwise. Here r some tips:

(1) Steer him in d right direction: U kno ur anatomy ( soft spots) more than anyone so don’t be shy to give him tips on how, where, what to do to get u to ur destination.

(2) This isn’t for everyone cuz of culture & personality differences but some psychologists av suggested d use of sex toys, role playing and videos to frequent orgasms

(3) Spontaneity: Unexpected & random sex in unusual/risky locations triggers (epinephrine) which leads to higher excitement/ arousal

(4) Break the Ice: Discuss wt him right after a sexual encounter emphasizing ur displeasure or why u aren’t happy ( Ds will most certainly lead to a fight, breakup or rants bt he may take it as a challenge and put in more effort)

(5) Faked orgasms debacle : some ladies av faked orgasms wt their man so many times hoping he’ll gt better one day bt they’re now dissatisfied so they can’t tell him they haven’t climaxed b4 cuz they’ll expose themselves.

In my opinion there’s no way to tell a man u’re not satisfied without deflating his EGO, also some men don’t like being told what to do so I suggest u av patience wt him, tell him indirectly, guide him, enlighten him dt sex isn’t about him alone and its a 2 way street ( give & receive )….. so he shld stop shouting “wà fë kú lálé yì” like a properly brought up Lagos taut

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